Friday, August 28, 2009

Listology: 5 More Celebrities I Could Probably Get Along With

You know, that last entry got me thinking. In the Hollywood jet set, how many of these celebrities might I actually be interested in associating with? I'm not going to lie: I'm a highly selective and judgmental person, and most celebs come off as the sorts of irritating folks i wouldn't be able to stand in real life. So, this is all totally superficial and obviously hypothetical, but let's look at the celebrity system as a sort of student body. It's your first day of school, who do you gravitate towards with little information outside of first impressions? We're not talking about the "who would you want to meet?" game, because wanting to meet versus actually being able to be friends with are two very different things. Like yeah, of course i'd love to meet Johnny Depp, but generally speaking i'm not too sure he'd really fit in with my group of friends. So, he'd be that loner kid reading Hunter S. Thompson and smoking under a tree just off the school grounds. Everyone wants to be friends with Johnny Depp, no one really gets to except for Tim Burton, who sometimes comes around with a journal and a video camera and pitches crazy schemes. Also, Quentin Tarantino would be like that guy i really liked talking to about stuff, but who i had to keep at a distance for fear he would get a really creepy crush on me. Amy Poehler would be someone who was fun to cause havoc in gym class with, but who i probably wouldn't associate with outside of school. Tilda Swinton and Cate Blanchett? They're on another level. Same with David Bowie, who i could probably only accept as a mentor, not a friend. We're talking about people who could actually sit on the couch on a night in. Got it? Alright. Now play along.

Tina Fey - I feel like these days Tina Fey's going to be at the top of most people's lists. For all practical purposes, she seems like she hasn't allowed the fame and statuettes to get to her head. She's not a party girl, doesn't have much for the tabloids to dig up, married a semi-normal dude, and distances herself from the Hollywood scene. Yet, she's something of an elitist bitch in her own right. Well, yeah, me too. For the most part, Fey's bitchery seems on par with mine. We don't like idiots, we take our work very seriously, we relate to others via sarcasm and snarky debasement. She would probably be fine with an evening of board games, B-horror films, and large quantities of junk food. So, she can hang out.

Seth Rogen - He's like Tina Fey for guys. Seth Rogen and i could hang out so long as he keeps the pot smoking to a minimum in my presence. Or, if he wanted to cut it out completely, that'd be cool too. I'm all for the economic ramifications of legalization, but walking around in a perpetual haze of marijuana smoke still lessens my opinion of people in the real world. That said, Seth Rogen comes across as a generally mild mannered dude who still hasn't quite come to terms with the fact that he's a full-blown star. He's a little self-conscious, generally friendly, able to write (see: Superbad), excitable in conversation, and is a perfect candidate for joining in on a lively round of badmouthing 12-year olds on XBox Live.

Kat Dennings - Dennings, perhaps best known for her role as Norah in Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist, doesn't just seem to be, but is a quick witted and slightly off the wall kid. She doesn't just play a normal person on TV. We can judge, based solely on her blog (which Wikipedia tells me she's had in some form or another since 2001), that she would make for an acceptable acquaintance. She reads real books! She draws pictures of space grits! She sings songs to inanimate objects! These are all things that happen in my life on a daily basis. For that matter:

Michael Cera - I'm pretty sure he's actually only slightly less awkward than the characters he's been pigeon-holed as. Awkward and a little underhandedly caustic? Yeah, i hang out with people like that all the time (it's a good thing). We could go to the bar to be social and then sit in the most isolated corner only talking to ourselves and avoiding eye contact with the people we're quietly mocking.

Jason Schwartzman - He plays a pretty good douchebag, but all sources say that's not the case. Schwartzman seems to be a sort of genuine, low-key, talkative guy who loves movies in a way that isn't completely superficial. Like, he's a film geek who just happened to win the family lottery. This is a kid whose high school girlfriend qualifications included liking the movie Heavyweights, who am i to say he can't hang out?

Who's in your entourage?

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